Happy Single Mother's Day!

 No matter what has happened in your life so far, no matter how long it’s been since you broke up, you are a still a mother and what greater gift could you have than that!

 I often think Mother’s Day is not a day for us to be recognised by others as the devoted mothers that we are, but as a day for us to recognise our own devotion and be proud of what we do each and every day!  This once a year ‘celebration’ could be better used to remind us to appreciate ourselves and our children. While it is truly wonderful to have the appreciation of others as a mother, especially from our kids, it is even more important that we recognise the amazing qualities of motherhood that we have in ourselves.

 Every day you give freely of yourself to your children. You clean, cook, care, nurture, listen, share, (occasionally yell, but you’re human), apologise, hug, laugh, cry and generally dedicate yourself to the lives of your children. Isn’t that something to celebrate in yourself every day?

 I find Mother’s Day causes me to reflect on my child and how incredibly gifted I feel to have my daughter. Yes, it was a tough and bumpy road through child birth and marriage to have her, but I wouldn’t change a thing if it meant I couldn’t have this wondrous person in my life! Not a thing. Every step was a learning, every problem a lesson. I have come out of my marriage break up stronger and wiser and I believe, ironically, a better mother for it.

 A single mum friend of mine recently asked me if I think it’s possible that single parents have a stronger connection to their children as a result of being single.  I truly think that’s possible. That’s not to say that there aren’t some incredible happily married mothers out there who are also great mums. Or to say that all single mothers are great parents.  But I feel that because we are single and have no-one else to whom we have to dedicate our time, we have the choice to give more of ourselves to our children. It is a choice that if made, can allow us to spend more time with them, listen to their concerns, help them heal and as a result, bond deeply with them.

 There is a reliance that develops as a result of a break up and both mother and child need the extra time together to reassure one another that things will be ok. I think that’s what ultimately can make the single mother’s bond very deep; that symbiotic reliance on one another to comfort each other and restore confidence together so that life can again be great.

 So give yourself a huge pat on the back for being your children’s mother. Thank life that you have your incredible children. Try not to miss the accolades, the chocolates or the flowers. There is no greater gift on mother’s day than your children.  Just by being themselves, they gift you every day.